


I Quit, Goodbye

by takemyopenheart



Series: Love Confessions [1]
Category: Open Heart (Visual Novels)
Genre: Boss/Employee Relationship, F/M, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:15:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25869520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/takemyopenheart/pseuds/takemyopenheart
Summary: All it takes is words to cause trouble in paradise. Will they become the end of Rachel and Ethan’s relationship?
Relationships: Ethan Ramsey/Main Character (Open Heart), Ethan Ramsey/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Love Confessions [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1885378
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	I Quit, Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> Collab with the wonderfully talented @whippedforethanramsey on Tumblr.

“How do you think the world will end, Ethan?”

Ethan looked up from his work to find his girlfriend staring at him pensively, waiting for a response. “You’re sitting there, eating an ungodly amount of junk food while watching a crappy rom-com movie and a question like that just pops into your head randomly?”

“Mhmm.”

“How your mind works will always be a mystery to me,” he added, heaving a sigh.

“Humor me?” Rachel persisted.

For a moment, the immensity of the question made Ethan uneasy. When he really thought about it, the reality of being as insignificant as a perishable life form on a rock floating in space ridiculed his very concept of human existence. He pulled himself back to reality and looked at her.

“There are many things that can happen. Earth can get swallowed up by a black hole. A ginormous asteroid could hit Earth. The Sun could start to die and possibly pull Earth toward itself. We’d be incinerated and then vaporized. Or the Sun’s expansion could push Earth out of orbit. It’d die frozen as a rogue planet, untethered to any star and drifting through the void. Or the whole universe could blow apart. But all of these are just conspiracy theories, plausible only to an extent,” he answered.

She stared at him, wide-eyed. “I shouldn’t have asked this question right before bed. Now I’ll be tossing and turning, wondering about all the possibilities.” She stifled a yawn behind her hand.

“No you won’t. You’re really tired. You’ll fall asleep as soon as you hit the sheets,” he declared matter-of-factly.

“Yeah, it’s been a long day,” she mumbled, her eyes fluttering closed as exhaustion finally caught up to her. “Carry me to bed?”

“You’re so spoiled you know.” He gently picked her up and walked towards their bedroom. She smiled at him softly and snuggled closer to him, burying her face in his chest.

He placed her on the bed, the cool sheets eliciting a soft moan from her mouth. He shook his head, unable to wipe off the adoring smile that played on his lips. He bent down to leave soft, gentle kisses all over her face and she giggled in response. Finally, he straightened up to leave when he heard her whine.

“Mooorrreeee!”

He bent down to peck her lips again. “You’re greedy.”

“And you’re the best, I love you!” She grinned at him.

The words that left Rachel’s mouth made Ethan’s throat run dry and a shiver ran down his spine. He gawked at her in disbelief while she fell into a slumber. He wasn’t entirely sure that she said what he heard. How can a person confess their love to someone and fall asleep like it was nothing?

Ethan found the world spinning around him as her words echoed in his mind over and over again. The air inside their bedroom suddenly felt heavier. He rushed to the balcony, and the night’s cold air hit his face. He took in some deep breaths, grounding himself.

He felt as if his head was going to explode. She told him that she loved him. Just like that. So easily. _How could she do it so easily? Did she not mean it? How is it so easy for people to confess that they love someone?_ His mind was swamped with countless questions, unable to find a single answer.

He went in and poured himself a drink before returning to the balcony. The chill in the air was somehow making him feel numb, and he preferred that over the emotions in his heart and the questions in his head. He stood there for a long time, staring at the cityscape. The glass hung in his hand as he stood still and motionless, staring into the horizon. The city of Boston looked serene at this hour. The city made no sound except for the occasional sirens of ambulances and police cars, the distant laughs of neighbors. The peace and silence engulfed him, providing the comfort and calm he was desperately seeking.

After what felt like only a few minutes, Ethan felt an arm slide around him. “What are you doing up till this late, honey?” Rachel’s sleepy voice came from behind him as she rested her head on his back. He tensed under her touch. Everything that he had pushed out of his head for the past few hours came flooding back in. Her words rang in his ears again. He could hear her distant voice calling his name. He heard it again, louder this time. 

He snapped back to reality to see Rachel standing in front of him now, brows knit in worry. “Are you feeling fine?” Her question made him realize that he hadn’t answered her former question.

“I’m all right. I just… couldn’t sleep,” he spoke, his voice hoarse from hours of not speaking at all. He cleared his throat, giving her a warm smile, and lifted his hand to caress her face, stroking her cheek with his thumb. “You should go back to sleep, Rach. You’ve got an early shift tomorrow.”

She leaned into his touch for a moment and then nodded her head before stepping away. “Sleep soon,” she said softly as she made her way back to their room.

“I will,” he reassured her, watching her retreating form.

The next morning, Rachel woke up cursing at her alarm and the sun rays that peaked through the heavy curtains. She yawned, turning her head to look for her boyfriend, only to find the spot empty. She sat up swiftly, rubbing her eyes to bring them into focus. His side of the bed was untouched and cold, meaning he hadn’t slept there all night. She went in search of him and found herself alone in the apartment. When she picked up her phone to call him, she noticed the text from him, explaining that he had left for work early, and a sigh of relief escaped her.

It took her only a few minutes to get ready for work. Before leaving for the hospital, she poured her coffee in a flask, foregoing making herself something to eat since her plan was to have a good, hearty breakfast with him at the hospital. Once there, she walked to his office, humming to herself, and stepped through the door.

There was no sign of him. She phoned him, but received no answer. Before she could call again, her phone chimed and Ethan’s message popped up at the top of the screen.

_‘I’m in a board meeting regarding personnel performance matters. Will be busy the entire day.’_

She felt the pang of disappointment upon reading the message. Though there was no point in dwelling on it, so she continued with the rest of her day, looking forward to seeing him at home.

After a busy day, Ethan finally came home extremely late that night. He crept to their bedroom and was glad to find Rachel already asleep for the night.

For the next few days, she often found him wandering off anytime she was near. At first, she hadn’t thought much about it and simply deduced it to being stressed from work.

This continued for a couple of days, until it finally all came to a breaking point. Rachel arrived after a long shift, trudging through the apartment. She hadn’t noticed him sitting in the armchair until she switched the lights on.

She jumped back in stunned surprise, letting out a shriek. “Ahh! You startled me!”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to,” Ethan replied.

“Why are you sitting here in the dark,” she asked him. “…and have you been drinking?” she added as she noticed the almost-empty decanter beside him.

He didn’t answer either one of her questions. He got up and started walking towards the bedroom when she called him from behind.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m tired. I’m going to sleep.”

“ _Of course_ , you are,” she scoffed, to which Ethan whipped his head around.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Ethan, do you think I’m blind? Do you think I haven’t noticed the way you’ve been ignoring me for the past entire week? I’ve tried to reach you so many times, but you just keep pushing me away. And I don’t even know what I did to deserve this!” A strangled sob left her lips at the last sentence.

A stabbing pain hit his chest at her words and the sight of her pained expression. His immediate reaction was to try to comfort her, but as he reached forward, he froze in his step. He wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around her, to calm her down and comfort her, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

It took her a moment to steady herself, and when she finally did, she continued. “What’s going on, Ethan? Please talk to me.”

“You love me, Rachel, and I… don’t. It’s as simple as that. You told me that you loved me last week, Rachel, and that’s the obvious next step in a relationship for you, but I don’t believe in love. I can’t take that step with you.”

The shock was evident on Rachel’s face as she spoke. Every part of her became frigid, rooting her to the spot. “What do you mean that you don’t believe in love?”

“Love is nothing more than an emotion, an urge. It’s just brain chemistry, Rach. It’s a complex series of computations of the subconscious brain that gives us an emotional experience we can’t control. There’s no such thing as love. I care about you deeply, and I like to be with you, but please don’t expect me to find sense in a concept as ludicrous as love, ” he explained.

“ _Can’t control_ being the words of significance there,” she hissed, her tone cold and menacing.

“What?” 

“Isn’t it obvious, Ethan? Love is challenging your old identity. It’s making you feel exposed and vulnerable. It’s uncharted territory for you, and your core defenses are being challenged.”

He felt uneasy and uncomfortable under her gaze and her words calling him out.

“Love is so much more than brain chemistry or an emotion, Ethan. Love is giving, self-sacrificing, honest, long-suffering, long-lasting. Love means committing yourself without guarantee and you’re not used to it, are you? Not everything in life needs to be calculated, Ethan. Learn to let go. Trust the fall. Being deeply loved by someone gives you the strength, while loving someone deeply gives you the courage to do it.” Hope glimmered in her eyes with every word she spoke.

“Why can’t you just let it go, Rachel? It’s just three simple words! Are you going to throw away this relationship just because I won’t say three stupid words back to you?”

“Those aren’t just words to me, Ethan! And what relationship are you talking about? The one where we live together, spend every free moment together and fuck every now and then? That’s what you call a relationship? Where is the meaning in all of that, Ethan? What’s the point in it all? Where are we going with all of this? I cannot be a part of it if that’s what you call a _‘relationship’_ because it has no future if you only see it that way.”

“I don’t want to live a life without you in it, Ethan,” she trembled, feeling her angry demeanor crack. “I’ve always been there for you through thick and thin. I waited for you each time you ran away, each time you stepped back, there was never anyone but you. I believed in us. I held on to that hope. You inspired me in so many ways, not just professionally. I grew to love you, Ethan. But God! I’m so tired now. I cannot do this every fucking time! I cannot wait my whole goddamned life for you to get your shit together, Ethan.”

“Well, I never asked you to do any of it, did I?” he snapped. “Don’t pretend like I asked you for any of this, Rachel. I tried to put distance between us. I tried everything to stop you from getting too close to me. Hell, I even went thousands of miles away just so that I’d have a peace of mind and stop you from invading my goddamned head! And then you kissed me that night I came back. Right after I told you that I considered us reset. But you don’t know when to quit now, do you?

“No you didn’t, Ethan. You most definitely didn’t ask for any of it,” she spoke bitterly. “But at least you finally got the guts to admit that you didn’t leave all for the sake of _professionalism_ like you always claim. You ran away because _you_ , Ethan Ramsey, are scared of intimacy and feelings, of truly opening your heart to anyone. And it looks like I finally learned how to quit because I’m leaving, Ethan.”

She stormed towards the door, only halting as she reached for the doorknob. She abruptly turned, staring as he stood with his back to her. Her heart broke a little more at the sight. _‘He didn’t even turn around and you hoped he’d try to stop you,’_ she thought to herself.

Rachel always believed that when the world would end, it would be caused by something massive, something explosive. But there she stood, her whole world shattering in front of her eyes in silence… _his_ silence. Of all things that could end their relationship, confessing her feelings being the reason was the last thing she could have ever imagined. The absurdity of the situation made her feel so stupid, so helpless. She took a large, shaky breath before speaking up. “And, Ethan, I mean what I said. I don’t want to live in a world without you in it, but do not forget that I sure as hell can!” With that, she walked out, slamming the door behind her.

Ethan winced at the loud noise. He couldn’t move, and he didn’t try to. He stood rooted in the spot. His schooled features did not give away the storm raging inside him. His mind was running at a great speed. Rage and agony burned him under his skin. His mind screamed and laughed at him.

 _‘She left you. You trusted her. You believed her. You opened up to her. Hell, you changed for her. And she left you. All because you couldn’t say three stupid little words to her. You knew this is what would happen and you still let her in! Everyone leaves in the end, Ethan. And you thought she was different.’_ A humorless laugh escaped his lips, ringing in the cold, empty apartment. He uttered in a hoarse, weak whisper, “she left me…”


End file.
